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I've Lost My Therapist

$149.00

When you enter therapy, you don't think about the possibility that your therapist might die suddenly, or contract a terminal illness.  And hopefully this will not happen while you are seeing the therapist.  

Unfortunately, it does happen.

The loss of a therapist is an intensely personal experience, and if this has happened to you, you probably have found that others do not fully grasp the impact on you. There is no ritual available like there is if you lose a family member. You may have confusing feelings, and wonder where to turn to process the loss, given that the person to whom you’d normally turn is gone.

If you would like to explore joining a therapist loss support group, or just talk, please use the contact form or send me an email at dr.jeff@jeffreyaxelbankpsyd.com.

When you enter therapy, you don't think about the possibility that your therapist might die suddenly, or contract a terminal illness.  And hopefully this will not happen while you are seeing the therapist.  

Unfortunately, it does happen.

The loss of a therapist is an intensely personal experience, and if this has happened to you, you probably have found that others do not fully grasp the impact on you. There is no ritual available like there is if you lose a family member. You may have confusing feelings, and wonder where to turn to process the loss, given that the person to whom you’d normally turn is gone.

If you would like to explore joining a therapist loss support group, or just talk, please use the contact form or send me an email at dr.jeff@jeffreyaxelbankpsyd.com.

  • If your therapist had died , you are likely to feel lost:

    • no one can really understand what this loss means to you

    • there is no ritual like there would be if a family member died

    • if you go to the funeral, you realize that the therapist had a family, and they are higher on the "bereavement hierarchy" than you are

    • the very person to whom you'd usually turn in such situations is gone

    • you still have the issues you were going to therapy for in the first place, but now nowhere to turn for help

    • should you go back to therapy right away?  And if you decide to do that, how will you find a good therapist, since no one can replace the one you lost?

    • you may have anger at your therapist if they did not make arrangements for this possibility as they are ethically supposed to

  • I understand this because I have gone through it myself. My experience was reported in an article in the NY Times. You can also listen to my interview on the Time & Other Thieves podcast. It’s because I know what this is like that I am offering support groups for people who have lost their therapist.  You'd be meeting with a select group of people who will uniquely know what you are going through.

  • If you have landed here, you have probably lost your therapist, perhaps suddenly, and with no or little preparation. Someone has referred you to me.

    The first step is to contact me. You can use the contact form on this website, or email me at dr.jeff@jeffreyaxelbankpsyd.com. We will set up a time to talk to see how I can best help you through this trying time. We can arrange to meet individually as much and as often as you would like. And if there is a support group starting soon, we can discuss whether that opportunity would be a good fit for what you need.

  • I had a chance to be in a group run by Jeffrey three months after the sudden death of my therapist. In all that loss and pain we created this odd connection for the strangest and loneliest of experiences, losing a therapist; and it was a lifeline for me. Being in community while in this grief helped more than I can ever express. Jeffrey took people from all over the country and brought us together to share and ritualize our grief into something less lonely. Jeffrey allowed us the freedom to define the group and allow the people in group to meet its needs while leading with thoughtful insights and the grace of someone who also knows this pain. I am forever thankful!

    Rosanne Marmor

    After my therapist died suddenly, I joined Jeff's group. At the beginning of our meetings, I felt muffled. Talking with others who know how it feels to have a therapist die helped. I made deep relationships with group members. Because of the process of the group, I found my voice to say what I feel and think in group. I am deeply grateful to Jeff and to my group members as I continue to heal.

    Penelope Moore

    Participating in the group on Therapist Loss organized by Dr. Jeffrey Axelbank was profoundly meaningful, offering a rare space to process the unique grief of losing a therapist.  Hearing others’ experiences lessened my sense of isolation and disorientation and supported both my personal and professional healing, giving me greater clarity and strength.  Dr. Axelbank is to be commended for creating a safe place and acting as a compassionate guide, enabling all members to explore and work on integrating an array of complex feelings triggered by this very special loss.

    Bill Yelen

    The grief group was a lifeline for me. Jeffrey and the group members knew my pain, and their warmth and support got me through those really dark months after my therapist’s sudden death. 

    Eileen Finkelstein

    I found the series of Life Coaching Sessions, led by Jeff Axelbank, to be supportive as the group consisted of sensitive individuals who had good insight and often offered wise advice. Being a part of it was comforting and definitely made me feel less alone.

    Anonymous